I'm not trying to get you to dwell in the negative about your ADHD. I'm actually trying to help you fully acknowledge the challenges you are facing, so you can make day-to-day tasks less daunting. The first thing to remember is that
- Chores are harder for people with ADHD. They are not easy. It is part of your ADHD. "This should be easy" is not true.
Now that we have that down, and you remind yourself of it every few minutes,
- You are probably coming up against a sense of shame, helplessness, or worthlessness. It comes from a lifetimes of being told- and telling yourself- that chores should be easy. So doing chores may be a constant battle with those feelings. That in itself is a lot of work.
- Chores are "circular," meaning they don't get done except maybe for now. There's always more. That is hard when you have ADHD
- Chores involve visual overload if things are messy.
- Chores are boring! Boring means it's really hard to focus if you have ADHD
- Chores involve lots of little decisions, like where to put each object, what order to clean something, what is clean enough, what you really have to get done. Decision-making is hard when you have ADHD, even (and especially) about "small" stuff. This is hard to fathom for a non-ADHDer.
Good news: if you can stop being mean to yourself about finding chores hard, they get easier!